As many of you already know, I have been planning my wedding since October! We are less than a week away from the wedding day. It was kind of hard to figure out how to balance another big list of tasks in addition to all of the other things I do. Today, before my big day, I wanted to share some learnings that helped to keep me a little more grounded during this hectic time!
Identify a Support System
We know that having social support can help reduce stress at work from the research. Coworkers and those around you can provide you with advice, help you out when you are busy, and lend an ear when you need to vent. This is critical during wedding planning too! It’s important to surround yourself with supportive people. I am very lucky to have a great network of friends and family plus a great team of people I work with. Having supportive and helpful leaders, coworkers, and partner-in-crime (Katina!) has made this whirlwind time easier. Everyone has been understanding and willing to help out when needed.
I know that not everyone will have the same type of supportive work environment as I do. If you don’t, try to find your support elsewhere. Maybe there’s someone in your personal life that can help you with wedding tasks or other life tasks outside of work to lighten your load. And leverage your fiancé! Stereotypically, the bride is more heavily involved in wedding planning. Don’t let gender stereotypes stand in your way (if you’re in a heterosexual relationship). I think this applied to other major life events too. Any time you need to add more to your plate, getting help is important to keep your stress levels down!
Let Go of What You Don’t Care About
Katina wrote a great article about prioritizing your commitments. I encourage you to re-read it! When you wedding plan, you have a million little tasks and decisions to make. It can honestly feel like way too many choices, especially for someone that is very busy. Friends that have gone through this before me gave me some great advice. If you don’t care about something (but someone else does!), hand it off to them! Delegate tasks that aren’t important to you. If your mom really cares about flowers, let her pick them! If your sister cares about music, she can take care of it! It’s ok to not hold on to every single detail yourself. Of course, you can choose to have veto power but instead of doing all the research and work to get the final vendor lists, someone else can do it.
You will be amazed at how many people in your life have much stronger opinions about things than you do. I can’t imagine I’m alone in having this feeling. As you start to dive into wedding planning, figure out your top priorities. What do you care most about? Is it the venue or the food? Is it the photographer? What are the things that don’t matter as much? Do you care about the cake? Or the favors? List out those things that matter less to you and figure out who might care about it (moms are often a good bet!). If there’s no one that cares that much, maybe you can skip it. Or maybe you can ask a friend or family member to help anyways. Remember, you don’t have to do all of this yourself. Don’t waste your time on things that don’t matter to you.
Planning a wedding can take as much time as a full-time job. Making sure you have the right support system in place and a good list of priorities will help keep you on track with the rest of your life! Life doesn’t stop just because you got engaged.
The final thing to remember is that this is supposed to be fun! It’s an exciting time in your life. Don’t let the stress of all of it ruin the fun! Try to keep some normalcy in your life while sprinkling in some fun dates with your soon-to-be spouse! Enjoy the journey as much as you can and remember the most important part is the marriage at the end of it!